Monday Ranting: #disn*gga – Intentions & Double Standards

I guess it would be in poor taste if Madonna captioned this #selfiewitdisn*gga…I could be wrong!

I guess it would be in poor taste if Madonna captioned this #selfiewitdisn*gga…I could be wrong!

Over the past few weeks a couple of things happened. I watched The Butler, read an unsettling article about Madge, and joined a FB discussion all of which somehow or another circled around the N word. A week or so ago Madonna’s tightly botoxed face catapulted to the top of my newsfeed due to a recent gaffe on Instagram. We learned she calls her son Rocco a n*gga as a term of endearment. Shortly before the Material Girl took a left turn down tomfuckery lane I’d entered a FB discussion regarding the use of the n-word by non-black folk. I chased that drink with The Butler. There’s a scene where young Cecil is told by his mentor never to refer to himself as a house n*gger because it’s a term used by white people to degrade. Different juice made of the same fruit, right? Right! It’s both concerning and confusing why anyone uses the word considering its negative history but I’m sure our pop culture is partly to blame.

Contrary to popular belief no one black person, hell no single group of black people speaks for or is the voice of blackness. We don’t hold conventions and elect representatives. I know it’s confusing but it’s true. If ever I can say anything on this blog that people take back with them to their real lives, no two black people are the same; we’re very much like snowflakes, different and hashish. Along those same lines rappers, athletes, and celebrities (political or otherwise) do not speak for the group. Their thoughts, behavior, and/or misbehavior are single representations not to be categorized as the thoughts and/or behavior of the larger group. They represent a miniscule percent of the population and to be held accountable for their ills is a travesty. Just as I am not supposed to hold all white folk responsible for the atrocities of slavery, Jim Crow, Tuskegee, and a whole host of other ish I could name stop corralling black folk together in the box of pop culture caricatures.

Madonna, the cultural appropriation queen, falls in one of the two camps regarding non-black folk who thirst to sip from the cup of negro-dom. These folk believe their use of the n-word should be disregarded because their intention isn’t negative or their inability to use the word exists as a double standard. Let’s examine the first premise; no one gives an ef about your intentions bish! Madonna and her gold grill-wearing arse is a modern day minstrel show. If I decided to walk into your mom’s house and say what up you f*cking d*ck-sucking c*nt, that’s perfectly ok because I said it with Christian love and sisterly affection? I call bullshyt! A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet similar to a pig wearing lipstick is still swine. Even though I don’t actually mean your mom is a f*cking d*ck-sucking c*nt in no way makes those words less charged. You’re offended aren’t you…I was and I only typed the words.

Premise number two leads us even further into the irrational land of make believe. This was the crux of my Facebook conversation, why white people feel the need to even use the word. Before I dismantle the argument let me make sure I explain it properly. You’re upset because black people use n*gga and you can’t? What are you toddlers? Teenagers? Did I wake up and the world was one big arse high school? Remember when your mom asked you if you’d walk off a cliff if your friends did? Most assuredly you answered no, well let’s think like that shall we. Just because a group of African Americans (I strongly dislike this collection of words) runs around using the n-word haphazardly in these streets in no way means it’s in good taste making it therefore appropriate for full fledge consumption. And just to let you know not all black people use the word. Further there are a large percentage of black folk who are offended by its use. I don’t know maybe that’s a news flash. I could be wrong. As an aside do you take your decorum cues for rape from rapists…yeah I didn’t think so!

I’m forever at a loss as to why white people even want to say n*gga. If one of you Lovelies could enlighten me it would be greatly appreciated. Honestly I think you mothereffers really really need to cool down! I’m just joshing I said mothereffers with all the love of three cherubs. Smilesies! See as long as my intentions are pure as the water it doesn’t matter that I called y’all mothereffers. Since this ain’t The Golden Child and no one is looking for a bald Tibetan kid who raises folk from the dead I call bullshyt, two times! On a positve note at least Madge didn’t call one of her adopted chocolate babies a n*gga, small miracle, yo no se!

It’s a peculiar sensation, this double consciousness, and one that folk of privilege will never know. I’ve never wanted to be anything but who I am even with knowing that who I am is hated. The word nigger drips with the poison of hundreds of years of wrongdoing. It echoes a time when men and women were considered chattel, nothing more than the dirt beneath the foot of a boot. Pop culture would have you believe there’s something inherently cool about referring to someone as your nigga. Word? Word! But I fear for anyone who looks to the lyrics of a rap or the improper discourse of ill-advised youth as a way to conduct one’s self.

What says you Lovelies, black folk how to you feel about non-black people using the word? Do you use the word, if so why? White folk please shed some light on the reasons why you’d choose to use the word? Why are you so offended by the double standard? Speak on it in the comments, as always to share is to care and hashish!

5 Responses to “Monday Ranting: #disn*gga – Intentions & Double Standards”
  1. iamdashsr says:

    Again, As usual you are spot on with your thoughts and remarks. I was raised to not use the word just about at all. I still cringe inside to this day when I hear people use the N word. Have I used the word sure do i use it often? Nope. Oh and for the record to anyone else reading this I am a Black Man in his 30s, and though I never went to college I consider mysele well educated and a man of the world.

    Those things being said… Tom Fuckery sums up the use as a whole. As I like playing devils advocate, I know plenty of whites that too don’t like the word used. Example, I was working in my garage with some friends, 2 white guys, and a mixed white/Trinadadian Indian. The Mixed guy dropped the bomb and one of the White guys spoke up like “Umm Not Cool” and I was glad I didn’t have to be the voice. The Mixed guy explained that it was cool… and the white guy that spoke up and I both at the same time said no it’s not at all… There was another instance while working on cars again at my garage that a different person dropped the word and I tried to play it off as if I didn’t hear him and again the same white guy from before spoke up like… “Umm Not Cool” and his excuse was he was singing along with a song on the radio. O_o… Yeah that was the side eye I gave him… Again the guy that spoke up said something to him and I again was glad I didn’t have to. Now that I’m thinking about it. If there were any of my friends that I would give the “pass” to say the word it would be the guy that was speaking up to not allow it. He, to me is the blackest of all my car friends and the one that knows better than to use it. Funny.

    Now on the converse… I know plenty of “Wiggers” that say the N word ALL the time, and they have been given license to do so by those who glorify the words useage. Then those same people think is ok to use the word outside of there tight knit small uneducated circles. Not Cool…

    This is one of those things that will go down as the single most debated words in history, oh and I don’t give a Fuck if you spell it Nigger/or Nigga… It makes no difference to me, wrong is wrong, and while I dind’t fininsh the Buttler I a could have stood up in my living room and slow clapped when the older man told the butler to never call himself a House Nigger. That sigle scene changed the whole tone of the movie IMHO. Now I’m going to have to try and fininsh the movie.

    • Faith M. says:

      Hola IamDasher,

      You should try to finish the movie not because I say so but because it was actually a pretty good movie. I don’t gives passes to any non black people for the use of the word, singing lyrics or otherwise. There is nothing that they can do or say that will erase the historical context that the word conjures when used from the mouth of someone of privilege. Granted I only speak for myself. And I also don’t use the word “wigger” it implies there is something inherently different between ignorant white and black people when there is not.

  2. iamdashsr says:

    Oh and BYW… It is I am Dash, Sr… IDK why everyone runs the Sr into an er… IamDashSr vs IamDasher… I am a Senior… Not a reindeer.

    • Faith M. says:

      My apologies, I would blame it on autocorrect but I would be lying…until you said that I honestly saw it in my head as Iamdasher. As a side note I never thought about reindeer when reading your name I honestly thought it was one of those odd male superhero references. Don’t judge me!

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