Book of Questions Friday: Opposites Attract…Except They Really Don’t!

Lies, fairytales and fallacies...this is about as real as Shondranettakisha marrying Prince Harry...Chile Boo!!!

Friday’s Question from the Book of Question: Love & Sex #6, Are you more attracted to people whose personalities are similar to yours or very different? What differences attract you and why?> Pop Culture would have us believe that opposites attract. Everywhere you turn there’s a story about a down on his luck businessman falling madly in love with a low budget street walker, oh wait that’s Pretty Woman. Hollywood serves this dribble or variations of in a golden goblet but I don’t drink that brand of kool-aid. Don’t get me wrong, men sleep with and occasionally marry trashy bishes…accidently. This is the exception and never the rule. I’m sure there are quite a few housewife-converted heaux that would argue with me but I’d ask them to admit they are in fact in the minority. Not that we need to go to that extreme to prove my point or even answer this question.

Honestly I’ve skated around the issue a bit, no?

Anywho, I don’t believe true opposites attract. People aren’t magnets. I know I know Pre-Idol Paula Abdul told you if you take two steps forward and he takes two steps back, not to worry because opposites attract. But we know now that Paula plays hide and seek with the kids who use plastic scissors. You will never get me to subscribe to this lunacy. Opposites spark curiosity and we all know what curiosity did to the cat. Knowing that satisfaction brought the cat back speaks volumes to me. It means that once the tinge of I wonder what that’s like wears off you’re left with a mofo that smokes and refuses to go bowling, oh wait am I riffling through my closet again?

Hopping off my soapbox and putting my halo on the dresser I’m intrigued initially by men who aren’t surface level like me. But this intrigue is much like my incomprehensible desire to watch Hoarders. I’m fascinated, not enough to stockpile empty pill bottles and breed cats but just enough to continue watching. Call it arms length fascination if you will. I don’t need any of that random tomfuckery in my life space long term. Opposite attraction much like milk has a short shelf life. Once it sours, down the drain it goes. Now I will admit there does need to be some level of emotional/behavioral/social balance in a relationship, a little ying yang action if you will. But let’s be real folks just because you prefer jazz and he likes hip-hop doesn’t make you polar opposites.

If I move this topic beyond romantic relationships and examine my friends a bit, my core group of home skillets share a common thread. A theme of friendship if you will, very family oriented, honest, extremely opinionated, larger than life personalities, artistic, smart, loyal to a fault, hardworking, spiritual, funny and serve it straight with no chasers. While none demonstrates these characteristics quite like the other it’s these things that drew me to them. Although on Monday I suggested by some twist of fate I developed close ties with controlling slightly neurotic neat nicks, I know deep down it wasn’t fate. As humans we seek out people who are similar to ourselves because there is a level of comfort there. With these folks we can let our collective hair down and show our arse without judgment.

Don’t get me wrong differences are to be celebrated. Wander Bread will tell you that my friends are a stone cold bunch of oddballs but it works for me. I enjoy my smorgasbord but I know at the core they are those witty, neurotic, family oriented pull no punches group of freaks that get me. I seek that same level of get me in a true Potential.

Did I answer the question…maybe I might have gone too deep. Sometimes I overanalyze tis my natcha! The one personality trait that I can think of which is very different from me, I do tend to seek out menfolk who are laid back. But I would associate that with a balancing of the emotional/behavioral/social scale as opposed to being a polar opposite. That could be a rationalization, me no know!

So what says you, Are you more attracted to people whose personalities are similar to yours or very different? What differences attract you and why?>

As always to share is to care and hashish!


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