Monday Ranting: Whatever Happened to Dinner and a Movie

I do understand dating women is a daunting task with all the games and hoops men must jump through, however that doesn't mean you throw all dating dos and don'ts out the window.

Men a lot of times crawl under my skin. Not to say that women don’t because they do but to a lesser degree. And since I’m not romantically attracted to women their batshyt crazy only makes me laugh. Men on the other hand drive me to a different level of agitation. Of late, I’ve noticed a serious decline in what I’d label courtship. Not that I expect to sit on a porch-sipping mint julep in a wide brim hat in the summer while gentleman callers recite love sonnets. I mean come on I don’t have a swing nor a wide brim hat and if a man started up with shall I compare thee to a summers day jazz I’d give him a cruel side-eye. I’m not anticipating a potential boo to locate The Man Wander Married and ask for my hand but my damn when did general dating dos and don’ts get thrown out the window.

Modern men have forgotten or outright abandoned what I’d call courting principles. Wikipedia loosely defines courting as “…the period in a couple’s relationship, which precedes the establishment of an agreed relationship…the role of a male to actively court or woo a female…” Yeah I know how antediluvian that sounds but damn dude, show a little effort. Here’s a list of things that grind my gears that dating and mating men of the twenty eleven seem to do.

Extended Textersation Drives Me Batty!

Unless it’s during working hours or I initiated the conversation via text I probably don’t want to have an extended text-a-thon. Why? Well simply the time it took for us to pitch text back and forth for an hour equals a five-minute chitchat. Please don’t waste my time. Not to mention that if we just met up I will not take you seriously. How can I take a grown man seriously that communicates with emoticons? Maybe these men missed the class teaching that women fall in love between their ears not by touching a screen or stroking keys.

Unsolicited Peen Pictures Get Extreme Side Eyes o______O

Now that I’ve learned how to turn off the preview text message feature this doesn’t cause as many problems but it still upsets my colon. Let me be the first to tell you that if I have no plans on ever having the chex with you, I’m going to show my friends your mantool. Yes I know that’s juvenile but wang glamour shots dismantle any kool credits earned to that point. And yes we do laugh at some of them. Everyone isn’t blessed and camera phones are the devil. Bottom line here, think before you text because your manhood could end up on someone’s website when dating goes wrong. Side note I’d never internet publish a nude because that would just be wrong.

Non Planned Dating Makes My Blood Boil

Since we’re in the trust tree I’m going to let you in on a secret. Women like going on planned dates. If for no reason at all it shows that once you stop envisioning the chick butt naked you took the time to think about her interests. Granted I understand the daunting task of planning dates for uncompromising women with unrealistic expectations. My advice for that, stop picking persnickety chicks. I’m not that girl and pretty much just like to see creativity and an iota of thought besides if I give her a drink she might let me touch her boobs.

Second I know what I like and if I wanted to date myself I wouldn’t need a dude for that. Maintain my interest level by showing me things you like to do. Of course I won’t enjoy everything but isn’t dating about getting to know the other person. If we keep going places and doing things I did before I knew you, I’ll lose interest faster than a Kardashian marriage. To be clear I don’t need to get to know me, having lived in my skin for the past 30 years certifies me as an expert in all things Faith. Non Planned Dating is a sure fire way for me to ignore your future phone calls and text messages.

These are just a few of the bastardizations of dating and mating running across my path these days. What says you, do believe that men court women? Are women open to being courted? Are there other non-courting behaviors I missed? Men, are there specific reasons why you employ these practices. As always to share is to care and hashish!

One Response to “Monday Ranting: Whatever Happened to Dinner and a Movie”
  1. Ms. Romeo says:

    I might just love you (in a sisterly way that is) but I soooooooo agree…courtship has been demolished! Texting between strangers is completely out of control and the pee-wee pictures are at a monumental high, I figure someone must like them because geez there are so many floating around…I am tired of having to jump in the driver seat (figuratively & literally) and plan dates…but then he wonders why I prefer hanging with my sister-girls or my d@mn self…what to do?

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