Blog Challenge Post 15: The Nickname Game

Hi my name is Faith and anything other than Faith might get you kicked in the stones.

Unlike a lot of folk I don’t have a name that’s easily shortened into something fantabulous. This works for me. I prefer people to speak to me using the moniker bestowed by my parental units. It’s sentimental and hashish and not for nothing, it suits me. Many have tried and failed at shortening Faith to Fe or some other ridonkulous bastardization. Even when peoples veer off the beaten path they usually find a way back to using my real name. Maybe it’s the side eye I give, me no know. Unless told otherwise I typically address folk by their government except when I use a Faith appointed nickname.

Nickname you say? Nickname I say!

Some of these names are playful, others might rest on the side of childish but they make perfect sense when anyone meets the person. For instance I call The Best Friend’s ex boo-thang, Dapper Dan. Sparked primarily from his dapperness one New Years’ Eve and his alleged thievery of Male Nurse Friend’s leather gloves. Now we all know Dapper Dan didn’t pilfer the gloves (MNF has a serious case of the dropsies) but Male Nurse Friend said something like there was no one else there nearly as dapper that night who would think to pocket his butter leather mitts. From there Dapper Dan was created and has remained still. In conversation, to his face and in my cell that is his name. Besides he likes it. Why, because it suits him! He wears it well and I’m 73.7% positive it feels like cashmere.

Back in the day I wished I had one of those gawt awful names like Gertrude so I could be called Trudy. My sincerest apologies to the Gertrudes in the audience, but you gotta it from your momma. After some reflection and examination of the Trudy’s of the world I decided being saddled with a name of non-shortening was actually a blessing in disguise. I say that because I work with a woman, smart as a whip I might add, named Deborah. I love her name’s Hebrew origin. In it’s most simple form it means bee, the literal translation and hashish. It’s also the name of the first if not only female judge in Israel’s history. Oh you fancy huh? As a closet nerd and self-proclaimed word freak my true affinity with her name is in the way it sounds when pronounced accurately. Much like Fatima, favorite daughter of the prophet Muhammad and his only child to bear children.

Where was I going before I took you on an Encyclopedia Britannica adventure?

Oh yes the shortening of names. So in professional life everyone wants instant familiarity. It’s a sign of we coolness. In actuality it’s counterfeit closeness but workfolk like simulated realsies and anything that requires a conference call. Because names like Deborah and Christine are easily shortened to Deb, Debbie and Christy and Chris folk take it upon themselves to do just that. Pause! Look before you leap! If I don’t sign my e-mails with the abbreviated version of my name or tell you explicitly to call me X you bets to act like you know.

More annoying than the faux work nickname, the nickname you’re too damn old to use. Included in that bunch the utterly inappropriate name as well. This would include anything in the ballpark of Dookie, Dirty, Poopsie (I’m guilty of calling an adult male and female cousin this out in the streets) and/or Binkie. Something’s wrong here…friends don’t let friends call them Lil Darkie.

Maybe it’s me….I think too long about things that are unimportant. What says you how do you feel about nicknames? Do you allow folk at work to use the endearing terms selected by friends and/or family? Do you have an embarrassing nickname that folks use despite you telling them not to? Are you of the name-shortening variety or do you prefer the name your momma gave you?

Stay tuned for Friday’s Blog Challenge Post 16 where I reveal a confession…hootenanny and shenanigans will ensue.


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