Monday Ranting/Blog Challenge 8 : What If Facebook Didn’t Exist…

Who remembers this logo when Facebook was exclusive and everyone's mom wasn't on here posting about knitting and babysitting?

Sometimes at night when that skeezer, Insomnia doughies through my bedroom I sit up and play the what if game. The what if game transports my mind into a mystical place filled high with blue diamonds and purple horseshoes. Oh wait…what I meant the what if game dismantles reality and distorts the future. A lot of times I get so lost in the what if game sleep escapes me and I sit up the whole night envisioning scenario upon scenario. Most times this revolves around my family, relationships or career…other times it’s hella random. Just the other night I what if-ed the whole night away thinking…

What if Facebook didn’t exist?

Now why you wanna go and do that love huh?

If Facebook’s App was removed from my life space everyone should expect belated birthday well wishes. I kid that’s why I have a cell phone. More importantly the infamous Facebook celebrity would be no more. How disappointing. I love obnoxious FB statuses. For mild entertainment purposes I remain FB friends with folk just to see impromptu innaweb goonery and buffoonery that has no real life application.

Every once and again someone drops the lovely, but entirely too personal stat that ruffles someone’s feather and you see an entire thread of too much information. I loves it…I absolutely loves it. Much like the carton of potentially sour milk, I’m itched just enough to scratched it. I must know if it’s sour and I have to read the ratchetness. Not because I co-sign the ignance but because I’m sometimes entertained by it, don’t judge me. Momma needs her daily dosage of the ignance and ratchet. Nothing but the Book serves this purpose.

More importantly I could never get away with saying Facebook me. Yes I’m a notorious Facebooker. I rarely share my number with anyone. If I fork it over consider it a compliment of epic proportion. Normally when I end pleasant conversation with folks I have no interest in ever speaking with again I tell them to Facebook me knowing full well they’ll never find me. Yes I play incognegro games with the Book. My privacy settings are something so serious. You can search my name, prior schools, city, employer and even my e-mail address and you’ll NEVER find me. NOT EVER! I know it’s wrong but if it’s wrong I don’t wanna be right. No Facebook my veil of secrecy forever dismantled, BBM sad face!

And not for nothing the epic motion picture that is the Social Network would be no more and I would have missed Rashida Jones say,”…85% of emotional testimony is exaggeration…the other 15% is perjury.” I feel the same way about emotional conversation!

What says you, what would bother you most if Facebook didn’t exist? Do you even have a Facebook page? How important are social networking sites in your life space? Are you over connected? Do you FB, Tweet, Tumblr etc etc etc? As always peeps sharing is caring and hashish.

Stay tuned for Wednesday’s Blog Challenge Post where I’ll discuss something that I’m afraid of/scares me.

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Comments
2 Responses to “Monday Ranting/Blog Challenge 8 : What If Facebook Didn’t Exist…”
  1. Dewan Gibson says:

    If Facebook didn’t exist I’d be hanging out on my favorite 24 hour nightclub of the early 2000s, Myspace, searching for women by zip code and body type (thick, oh yeah!).

    • Faith M. says:

      Hmm I knew your face looked familiar….I kid I kid. Myspace was a place ripe with ratchet, somedays I cry for what we lost.

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